The choices we make, shape who we are. They also shape those around us. You may not even realize the circle of influence that you have. There is a ripple effect of your choices and your actions. Whether you affect your students in your classroom, your colleagues at work, your friends or your family, you have an effect. Just thinking about this, seems like a heavy weight to place on one’s shoulders. Does this idea change who we choose to be? For me, the biggest choice I make everyday, is to be authentic. To be true to myself. It is unfair to myself and others around me, to be anything different. Sometimes I find myself apologizing for this. Yesterday I heard myself saying “I’m sorry, I can only be me”. What was I apologizing for? I followed it up with “Why be anything different?”. I would like to think that I am the same person, regardless of the situation or the people around. Here is how I look at it. To me, being myself is tiring enough. Trying to put on an act, to be someone different; would be completely exhausting. I don’t see the point. I have tried...I have tried to act against myself, to protect myself. For me, it didn’t work, on the contrary, I just ended up hurting myself. So, how does this tie into leadership? One thing I have learned from various experiences; being on both sides of the leadership line...BE AUTHENTIC! And not just be authentic in what you say, but in what you do, how you act, how you interact. Do what you say, say what you do and follow through. Build authentic, trusting relationships. This does not mean you have to let people in on every nook and cranny of your life. It just means, to let your actions and your decisions stem from your core values. I have witnessed people try to wear different masks in different arenas, with different players. What I have seen...after a while those masks get all mixed up and the facade comes crumbling down. So I ask…”Why be anything different?”. By being authentic, it shows that you are human, people can connect. As a classroom teacher, you are tasked with having a significant influence over your students. I felt that I owed it to my students to be authentic. I made mistakes...a lot. It was important for my students to see this, and see how to work through this. I have failed...I have fumbled...I have laughed and I have cried. These are all things that show our students that we are NOT superhuman, we are just like them. But as much as I believe in being authentic, I know it is not easy. When you are authentic, you open yourself up to being vulnerable and that is scary. You may get burned and you may get hurt, but that is when you make that choice. YOU choose who shows up, everyday. For me, I say “You be you, and I will be me...why be anything different?”
9 Comments
@ms_woz
4/12/2016 10:11:20 pm
Can't sleep. Saw you posted. This is my favorite post so far. I often apologize for who I am. I will no longer.
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Cori
4/14/2016 12:06:04 pm
Thank you for sharing that this spoke to you. No apologies...be you!
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4/13/2016 06:59:57 am
There is definitely truth in this post and in the reading that I have done, I would say there is so much truth in this for women in particular. As women in positions of leadership (any form) we need to do the modeling that who we are is enough. For some time the underlying message from society has been the opposite, hence the feeling like we need to apologize for being ourselves. Being truly authentic is a way of changing that and unbelievably important. Thanks for writing about this.
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Jenny
4/13/2016 08:46:10 pm
Having authenticity in all you do, never apologizing for being you, and recognizing the ripple effect of being your unapologetic, true self with others- these are lessons I try to teach my sons. I think it would be interesting to be aware of how often I feel the need to apologize for being myself over the course of a day. My guess is that even though I would describe myself as a confident woman, it happens frequently
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Cori
4/14/2016 12:15:03 pm
We have so many different roles in life and we meet so many different people. I think it is important that in these roles and with these people, we are the same, at the core. Actions and words may adapt (notice I say, adapt and not change) based on the role or the people...but as long as those core values are what is at the center of all you do, you are golden.
Cori
4/14/2016 12:10:24 pm
Thank you for your comment. I just find that if I act inauthentic, it just doesn't work. Let people see you...the real you. This authentic you, in essence can change, with experience, but I always think it's important to always go back to your core.
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Dianne Csoto
4/13/2016 09:42:39 pm
Very powerful words! I am glad you are yourself and have shared what you are with those lucky enough to work with you. I look forward to reading more of what ypu have to say.
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Cori
4/14/2016 12:11:32 pm
Thank you Diane. I feel lucky to work with you wonderful educators!
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PurplePM
4/14/2016 03:37:14 pm
Authenticity is a scarce commodity in our business. It's refreshing to read that someone is advocating for authenticity. Thanks for inspiring me to continue strive to project my authentic self in everything that I do.
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