This post is a bit off the "leadership" topic. But through this short journey towards leadership, I have fallen often, I have been cut, bruised and scarred. I think it is important to acknowledge this part of the journey because it is real and it can be a game changer. Sometimes you will want to pick up your ball and go home, sometimes you will want to pack up your bags and leave. But oftentimes, if you wade through it...you will find growth. A setback, a stumbling block, a bump, a blip, a fall from grace...such is life. We ALL encounter these as we move through the ebbs and flows of life. It is what we do in these instances that is most important. It is not the story of our fall, but of our rise. The great thing about OUR life, is that WE have choice. We can choose to go down the rabbit hole, or we can dust ourselves off, find the learning and keep moving forward. It is as I climb out of the hole and clean off the dirt, that I write this today. When I think back on the many students I have worked with over the years, and recount their various stories...I am in amazement. These children, in their young lives, have dealt with many such setbacks. But as they say, children are resilient. We can learn from them. We owe it to our students, our colleagues, our family and our friends to be resilient as well. Every time I stumble and fall, I force myself to get back up and keep going. But it is important to take stock and learn from the experience. Why did this happen? What could I have done differently? How could I have managed this better? What lesson did I learn? How will I use this new learning as I move forward? Newton's third law: for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. It is our choice...do we take what has happened and project it on to others or do we do the opposite and use our new found knowledge to help others? I choose B! Isn't this what we want to instill in our students? Isn't this, as leaders, what we want to instill in others? If we fail forward, we can only continue to cut our losses and rack up our gains. If we, ourselves, can do this, we can model and help others though this. As a leader, I would think that people look to you for that guidance. Just like your own children look to your reaction to gauge their reactions. The people in your charge, will look to you. It is important to be authentic in our reaction and subsequent actions. As a leader, of any kind, we will be faced with such instances...how will we handle it? So don't call it a setback...call it a comeback. 1) Give yourself permission to feel. 2) Give yourself time to reflect, but don't overthink, it doesn't do any good. 3) Ask yourself "what is the learning" and "how can I flip the switch?" 4) Ask yourself "how can I use this to better myself and for the betterment of others?" 5) React. You have a choice...equal or opposite? Just writing this post, being vulnerable...is the exact OPPOSITE of what I wanted to do. But there is power in all of our stories, so I decided to own it and grow....
2 Comments
4/17/2016 09:57:00 am
I think part of the authenticity journey is learning how to fall down and get back up in the arena. And only people that are willing to do the work of being vulnerable understand what that arena is. It is the embracing of all parts of our story that will lead to growth. Brene Brown says, "The middle is messy, but that's where the magic happens." (PS: The word magic itself has a whole story behind it re: those podcasts I told you about.) So prepare for something magical my friend!
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Jenny Goldman
4/19/2016 11:03:28 pm
I don't know quite how to say this but I am rather touched by the depth of your posts. You are taking a risk by putting it all out there on the line. Rather cathartic, yes?
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