I try my best to have such integrity...to do what I say I'm going to do, be true to my word, with others. I work hard to follow through with things, show up and support. But I have found a loop hole in my "integrity plan": ME. Am I living what I am "preaching" to others? This thought hit me like a ton of bricks as I was participating in #Ditchbook chat this week, that was led by Aaron Hogan (Author of Shattering the Perfect Teacher Myth). I like to believe that I reflect often, but his questions stopped me in my tracks. They forced me to reflect in a way I hadn't before. Unintentionally, that chat has sparked deep thinking and this post, today.
There are many "phrases" that I repeat often (I get tired of hearing my own broken record), but I say them because I whole heatedly believe in them. But am I "walking the talk" and believing in them for myself? I think until very recently I would have said "no", but I think I have turned a corner.
Time to reflect on these...
Tune Out The Chatter: Up until the very near present, I really struggled with this. I would let what others say, get into my head and deter my journey. I would let one comment send me down the rabbit hole and take up a lot of my energy in a spin. I have recently (with a lot of help from some amazing friends) realized how insane that was. If I believe in my purpose (which is always to do good) why would I let someone else knock me off that path? It doesn't do me or anyone else any good to spend my energy on it, time is better spent on continuing forward, if I know it is what is right.
Dare Greatly: Brene Brown's book Daring Greatly, changed my thinking and changed me. It is based around the Theadore Roosevelt quote:
I didn't realize that I had actually made the switch, until about a week ago. I was in conversation with my friend, Jon Corippo. He unknowingly brought it to my attention. He said "Now you just say yes to things, not even knowing where you are going." WHAT? Talk about a switch flip moment! As I thought about his statement, I realized that a year ago, he, himself had asked me to do something and I responded with "I'm not sure..." Which in my head translated to "I'm not good enough". He told me, that day, that I needed to just say "Yes" to such opportunities and since then I do. And OH MY GOSH, life changer! I now live by this "Leap Philosophy" of saying "yes" (to opportunities that match my purpose and passion) and figure out the rest after. So far, it has proven to be an amazing journey!
I have talked with those that I support about this topic, when they start to get overwhelmed. We talk about focusing only on those things that are in our locus of control. We can't be at our best, if we are putting our energy into those things that will never yield the results we want.
Within the last few weeks, I have finally taken it to heart, myself. I have been examining what takes up residence in my mind. Is it anything that I actually have control over? Is it something that will yield positive results for myself and more importantly, others? If not, I need to just let it go and find where I can actually make a difference. Place my energy where I can do good and help others, where my efforts will be received. Since making this cognitive switch, my overall outlook and attitude has changed for the better. It is a definite, huge win.
Why am I writing all of this? To be totally honest, it is to keep myself in check. I AM my own worst advocate! We need to be at our best in order to serve our purpose for others. This can only be done by constant self reflection and course correction. I am very blessed in that I don't have to always do this alone, in my head. I have some how collected an amazing tribe, who helps me with this. They do not even know their impact, but it has been life altering and I am thankful.
My call to action for you is to examine your words and thoughts and make sure YOU are advocating for YOU.
Mother, teacher, TOSA, GCE Level 1 & 2, Encourager of others.
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